random brain dribbles of a nurse, novelist, and ninja enthusiast

The Brazilian Wandering Spider: South America’s Deadly, All Natural Alternative To Erectile Dysfunction

Before reading take note of the drinking game in which one beer is consumed every time the male genitalia is referenced. Happy alcohol poisoning! 

Deep within the remote jungles of South America and elsewhere within the world lies the Brazilian Wandering Spider. This spider has conquered what modern middle age desperate scientists have not, despite billions of dollars of boner inspired research. For years man has struggled to master science in the interests of recapturing youthful rigidity. Every junior high kids worst gym class nightmare is every forty year olds hopeful wet dream and science has finally found an answer to all their flaccid prayers. But these modern pills have some stiff competition.

Hidden within the jungles of South America lies a merciless, vein swelling monster, waiting to pounce on its first unsuspecting flaccid traveler. Part homeless vagabond spider and part cock swelling homicidal maniac, this pint sized powerhouse packs a powerful penile punch (insert alliteration award here!).

Painful erections can last for more than several hours, landing you in the hospital or heaven where you can only pray for reprieve from the torturous turgidity exploding from your crotch. Despite severe complications associated with its bite (see: inflammation, severe pain, impotence, permanent nerve damage, and even death) it could serve as a potent, natural alternative to erectile dysfunction and science is feverishly searching for the swelling secrets hidden in this tiny spider. To assist you with a greater understanding of how this natural remedy works, I have enclosed the following handy outline.

Repost from original post dated August 8, 2012 at my old site.

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